September 18, 2003

Interviews

I spent all day today conducting job interviews at my alma mater, Tulane Law School, in search of candidates for summer clerkship positions at my firm. A few thoughts:

1) If you want to work at a large defense firm, it probably isn't a good idea to give your prospective employer a resume which lists all of the jobs you've had helping out plaintiffs lawyers who do nothing but sue the pants off the clients of said big defense firm.

2) If you have some weirdo specialty within the legal profession that is your sole dream to pursue, don't pretend that you are really open to doing anything. It is somewhat transparent. I had one guy today who told me that he is really interested in Intellectual Property or doing International Business Transactions. He obviously had not read my firm's website, as we do neither. When I explained this to him (gently), he said, "Oh, but I'm open to anything, really." Uh huh. If he really wants to pursue either of those fields, that sounds great, but I have only one suggestion for him: move. There aren't many law firms in Louisiana that do a great deal of either one.

3) If you want to work at a large defense firm and you have a section on your resume listing your "Interests", ones that might raise eyebrows include the following: hula dancing, hurricanes and "tropical weather systems", being a ballerina mistress (don't even ask), or anything that involves you spending inordinate amounts of time on your couch in front of your television. We all watch t.v. You don't need to advertise it on your resume.

4) Setting yourself apart from your competition = good. Making an ass of yourself = bad. I ran into my friend Margaret while eating lunch with my friend Steve during the lunch break. Steve was regaling Margaret and I with stories of hapless law students, desperate to get a job. One such 3L has not only embarrassed himself, but also Tulane Law School as a whole, by drafting his resume as a "Petition for Interview", which looks like a lawsuit you would file in court. Wait -- it gets better. He has numbered paragraphs, just like a legal petition, and they enumerate the reasons an employer should hire him. Examples include, "I will work as many hours as you want. I will work a 3000 hour year. If my mother dies, I will read her eulogy over the telephone. If I get married, I will tell my spouse that we can't take a honeymoon." Other choice examples include, "I will do whatever you need. I will retrieve a lost deposition transcript from the most foul smelling garbage." As an employer, this tells me that not only is he desperate, he has no clue of what associates at law firms do. We would never make anyone dig through foul smelling garbage to retrieve a deposition transcript. He could sit in the garbage can and do the summary in there.

Posted by Kitty at September 18, 2003 07:39 PM

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