December 10, 2004
Deck the Halls
I am trying to listen intently to this telephone deposition, but the pounding in my head isn't helping. I wish I could say that the headache is a product of being overserved at last night's Christmas party, but the truth is far from it. The party was sadly lame. It used to be that our firm's Christmas parties were legendary with all kinds of wild behavior resulting in an overactive rumor mill spreading stories for weeks afterward.
In fact, there were only three noteworthy events that came out of last night's party: (1) I got to see the guy who works in the mailroom who has a closed head injury (no, I'm not joking) dance like John Travolta to the song "Stayin' Alive" (it's a Christmas party tradition at the firm, but it isn't the same since he no longer wears his white suit, for reasons that aren't entirely clear to me); (2) I got to see the guy who works in the mailroom who's autistic sing a love song to the human resources director who he adores (another firm tradition); and (3) a homeless guy outside the party asked me to marry him. After I turned him down and related the story to my co-workers who were inside the party venue, they told me I had made a grave error in turning him down. They explained that homeless guys don't have any baggage (I assume they mean physical baggage, but that wasn't entirely clear to me, either), don't have debts (that they pay, anyway), don't make big demands and are pretty much happy with whatever you have to offer since they have so little to start with. I'm starting to think I need to reconsider my options here......
Posted by Kitty at December 10, 2004 04:08 PM
Comments
So what *did* cause the pounding in your head?
Posted by: Christoforo at December 12, 2004 11:44 PM
What did cause your headache? The deposition? I missed the Christmas party this year. I should have crashed it when I bumped into you on the sidewalk.
Posted by: "Chad" at December 16, 2004 03:45 PM
Actually, my headache that day was caused by a...uhm....monthly visitor. Chad, yes you should've crashed the party, though I don't think you would've wanted to stay long.
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Like a lot of other people, they're almost perfect until you marry them. Homeless guys/girls or no different.
On the bright side (For me, anyway), maybe there is hope for some of us future homeless guys after all. I think most homless guys start out in my profession.
Posted by: Rob at December 12, 2004 02:37 PM